


Goes Without Saying

by ToadstoolTea



Category: Engine Sentai Go-Onger
Genre: Abduction, Gen, Sillyfic, Strawberry Jam
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-04-15
Updated: 2011-04-15
Packaged: 2017-12-04 05:35:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,542
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/707131
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ToadstoolTea/pseuds/ToadstoolTea
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Post-Series.  They've saved the world, but Gunpei still has some unfinished business... and as usual, he's making things harder than they need to be.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Goes Without Saying

**Author's Note:**

> My first Super Sentai work (lol), post here, and humor fic in forever. Crossposted from my FFnet account with slight editing.

Heeeeeeeey! Didn't we _die?_ "

"We did. Er... I think we did?"

"Then why can't you give this a rest? We saved the world just yesterday!"

"Well, actually..."

......

Bright sunlight, clean spring air. It was the perfect morning, the type that reminded Saki she had a lot to smile about.

And smile she did as she hopped out of Ginjirou, stretching her arms up toward the sky. But her arms quickly fell to her side when she caught something out of the corner of her eye. Was that Sousuke? _Reading?_ Go-On Red, well... never read. Knowing the guy, Saki had even questioned if he even could but sure enough, he was sitting at one of the team's foldable tables and hunched over what looked like the morning paper.

She watched curiously as Sousuke flipped his lucky coin, and made a few marks on the page. After a few moments, she finally sat down beside the spiky-haired man. "What're you doing?"

He lowered the paper, winking and pointing exaggeratedly in that way that made Saki doubt his grey matter in the first place. Oh well. "Now that we're normal citizens again, I've got to find an apartment at _mach speed!_ "

The girl nodded, and her smile faded. He had a point. They couldn't live in a bus forever... She really hadn't thought about post Go-Onger life much yet. In fact, it seemed like only yesterday that she'd met BearRV and-

_CRASH!_

Saki shook her head, turning towards the Ginjirou, where the sound had come from. Broken glass? No, it was much bigger than that, as if a Bankijyuu had appeared...

"They're at it again." Saki and Sousuke turned to see Ren, balancing a pair of trays with the morning's meal. It was the usual; omelettes, buttered toast and strawberry jam, with some fresh sliced fruit on the side. Sousuke put down his paper and grabbed his portion while Saki leaned back in her chair and moaned.

"This early?" she asked.

Ren sighed, setting the rest of the dishes on the table and calling towards the Ginjirou. "Gunpei! Hanto! Can't you wait until _after_ breakfast to continue with that?"

There was another large crash before the bus went silent. Ren worriedly looked at the vehicle, and took a place at the table. The other two tried to get on with their meal, Sousuke cramming his mouth full of egg and Saki nibbling at her toast. The three ate in silence until the Ginjirou's door flew open and unintelligible crying filled the air.

_"--ohgawdpleasesavemehetiedmeup--"_

"Sorry Ren, we're going to have to skip breakfast. We have an appointment today."

The three looked up to see an interesting sight. Gunpei was dressed in a very smart two piece suit, quite different from the racing jacket and slacks the group was used to seeing him in. But even more curious was that he was nonchalantly restraining a shiny green thing in his clutches... under closer inspection the three were eventually able to make out that it was Hanto in a shimmering jade dress.

Sousuke, Saki, and Ren were surprised for about three seconds, but then they remembered that it was far from the first time they saw their team's youngest member in female attire.

_"-imsoscaredidunnowhathesgunna-"_

Go-On Black cleared his throat, and spoke over the young man in his grasp. "In light of recent events - namely, that one when we were nearly erased from existence - Father's demands have become more urgent." He rolled his eyes. " Something about me 'always putting myself in danger when I'm still obligated to propagate for the Ishihara household...'"

For a moment, Hanto stopped struggling, hanging in the taller man's grip with a confused look in his eyes. "What does that mean?"

As if on cue, Hanto, as well as Sousuke and Saki, looked to Ren. The latter took his cue. " _Just!_ Propagation in humans is the result of a gestation spurred by the successful formation of a zygote through sexual intercourse..."

"What? _WHAT?_ "

Sousuke watched as Hanto started flailing again, and Gunpei calmly continued restraining the boy as best he could. Then he nudged Saki, for the first time looking genuinely interested in the situation. "Hey, he just means to use Hanto as a decoy, right?" He took another bite of his omelette before he leaned over again. "And, if I'm not mistaken, the last time I checked a guy couldn't get another guy--"

"GUNPEI!" Saki jumped to her feet, and slammed her fists against the table. "You just need a girl to show up to convince your dad about the marriage thing, right?"

He nodded.

_"Look at me!"_

Obediently, the man narrowed his eyes at her.

Then he cocked his head to the side and stared some more.

Quite a bit of time passed, but Saki felt her breath catch when she noticed the look of realization finally cross the former cop's features. Then he opened his mouth.

"You've got jam on your face."

Ren offered Saki a napkin. She pouted.

_SWOOSH!_

Suddenly, a pair of figures fell out of the sky and stole everyone's attention. No, they didn't fall, they _flew_ \-- triple aerial somersaults in complete unison, followed up with poses worthy of Olympic gold. Colored flames shot out from the background. It was beautiful. Angels cried. Hanto was crying too, but for a different reason.

It was none other than Hiroto and Miu, the Go-On Wings.

"Y'know, you guys don't have to do that anymore," Sousuke grumbled and turned his attention back to his meal.

_"--hirotomiupleaseyougottasaveme--"_

The two went at ease, then noticing that Ren and Saki were making some ridiculous gestures to the side. They slowly looked over to see that Hanto was in a dress, and it looked like Gunpei was trying to kill him. The siblings were surprised for about three seconds, but then they remembered that it wasn't the first time they'd seen something like this happening.

Hiroto and Miu looked to each other, doing what the others presumed was that twin-psychic-link thing.

"Ani..."

"Got it."

The elder Sutou folded his arms and moved toward the wayward pair, looking over all the Go-Ongers as he slowly began to speak. "Really...? This is pretty obvious, but if no one else is going to..."

He stopped about a foot in front of the Gunpei, with a glance that could cut through solid rock. Hanto's squirming slowed as he looked to the Wing pleadingly... everyone around was holding their breaths. Hiroto was awesome... and like a genius or something. He'd be able to talk some sense into Gunpei for sure.

Hiroto nodded reassuringly at Go-On Green before he raised his gaze to meet Gunpei's once more. Then he spoke, his voice low and dripping with venom.

"You're an idiot if you plan on taking him anywhere in _those_ shoes!"

Silence.

Well, except for the sound of Sousuke falling out of his chair.

Even Hanto was speechless and limp in Gunpei's grasp, as his captor looked from the man in front of him to the nude-colored pumps he'd crammed the boy's feet into.

"They're not that bad, are they?"

"Just look at them!"

Even from his place on the ground, Sousuke craned his head to catch a peek at the pumps in question, and he unconsciously started nodding. Saki kicked him under the table, and he whimpered.

Miu ran up to join her brother, looking over Hanto before she piped in. "We're about the same height, Ani. I'm sure I can lend him something!"

"Really?" For the first time that morning, Gunpei was smiling. He chuckled as he looked down to his captive. "C'mon, let's go get some shoes!"

Then he tossed Hanto over his shoulder. Still completely restrained, Go-On Green called out to his breakfasting companions. "Whaaaaaa... I don't want shoes! I don't wanna propagate! Someone! _Anyone_ \--"

"Have a nice day, guys!" Ren smiled warmly as he waved towards the group.

He got an emphatic wave back from Miu, as well as another nod from Gunpei and a crooked smirk from Hiroto before they turned towards town. Saki managed to catch Hanto's desperate eyes and mouthed a 'smile, smile!'. He mouthed back, but it wasn't something that she was comfortable with repeating out loud.

At about that time, Sousuke was finally climbing back into his chair.

Go-On Yellow stared forlornly at her plate as she mumbled. "I'm cute, right?" Saki rapped on the table to get her companions' attention. "Look at me, Sousuke! I'm an adorable _girl!_ Why couldn't Gunpei ask me? Huh, Ren? I'm worth introducing to your parents... right?"

Sousuke reached across the table and brushed a hand over Saki's cheek, then held up a palm smeared with sticky red goo. "You might be, after you learn to feed yourself."

"I'm sure there's a bib in Ginjirou - remember that alien baby thing?" Ren grinned as he came to a stand.

Tears formed in the corners of the girl's eyes before she jumped up again, pushed Ren out of the way, and locked herself in the RV. Go-On Red cackled as he wiped his hands and took up his paper. Looking over the next column of ads, he tried his very best to ignore the sniveling coming from the vehicle and a familiar wailing from somewhere off in the distance.


End file.
